reflecting.

   so, I have been OBSESSED with watching fitness vloggers on youtube....and I can't help but think that I, too, would probably have a HUGE following like all these chicks, had I not somehow attracted a slew of asshole internet trolls back in 2009-2012 and got totally jaded and shut everything down.  I had to start a new fb page, privatize everything cuz of crazy stalkers etc.  I stopped doing videos and really had to put most of my life on lockdown for a few years.   now, I have limited followers, limited viewers, and all these other vloggers are excelling.   I am actually SUPER angry about it now that I am letting myself reflect on it all.   the market of social media vlogging/videos in the fitness field is soooo saturated, it's overwhelming to weed through them all.   back when I initially started, it wasn't nearly this insane!   nowadays, everyone with a cell phone shoots workout vids and vlogs!   on one hand, I think that's FABULOUS...on the other hand, it's going to make it harder for me to get back at it !!!    I intend to do my best.    not because I am trying to "compete", but because I LIKE making videos; I LIKE connecting with people and helping people reach their goals, or even just give them some new ideas!   I don't claim to have all the answers or be the best thing out there, but I LOVE fitness.  I LOVE the gym.   and I have fun with everything I do, and I like to open up my world for people to see.   unfortunately, that also means opening it to the negative shit-talkers that lurk on the internet and do their best to bring people down....  I am not a famous bodybuilder, I do not compete on the figure stage,  but  I am a lover of learning new things and teaching them to others!  I am a trainer with YEARS of experience under my belt.  I am a MOTHER of a 2 year old and I get the struggle women go through to get their bodies back after pregnancy....I have made this my life journey and I have a long way to go yet!!! 
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